23.3.05
Seriously.So I went to The Coffee Bean on Sunset and Vine today, thinking I'd treat myself to an English Breakfast Latte (I thought I couldn't live without them, but it turns out the powder they use pretty much kills you, so I stopped, but once in a while....) Anyway, so I'm standing in line, it's like 9am, and I'm really tired. And I'm thinking to myself, "Gosh, I'm really tired" and realize that I'm staring at the coffee maker dude and he's got this huge, I mean HUGE afro. Like , he's this total white kid with a Napoleon Dynamite afro. Nice! So I'm about to make up my mind to compliment him on his hair, when I notice that the woman that's about to take my order (as soon as she's done with the girl in the pink UGG boots in front of me) has a large afro too. And then all at once, like a head rush, I notice that the guy stocking the cups has an afro, and the guy making the bagel has an afro. It was this weird almost acid trip afro experience at the Vine and Sunset Coffee Bean. I was by myself, so I couldn't really bust out laughing, but it was really, really interesting in a David Lynch sort of way to see four rather white people wearing extraordinarily large afro wigs. I got to the front of the line, and just stared at the woman and her afro. I completely forgot what I wanted to order. I thought for a second I was going mad. Then I took a deep breath and said "Bagel." Then I fought the urge to start laughing outloud so my face got all screwed up from trying my best NOT to laugh, then I got all self conscious about what my face looked like, so I did this like, little fake-cough thing and acted like I was covering my mouth but I was really pinching my lips into subordinance. I'm in the middle of trying to say "English breakfast Latte" when I just couldn't help it and I started laughing. I shook my head and just said "I'm sorry I'm sorry..um...what did I want? English er, breakfast...latte." And the woman is just looking at me with flat eyes hating my very existance but more than that, hating Coffee Bean Corporate for making her wear that stupid afro to begin with. I didn't want to make it worse for her, which is why I was trying not to laugh, but dude it was so funny...I felt so bad for her, knowing that when the staff got the memo from Corporate with a box of afro-wigs they all just hated their lives like those girls at the Hot Dog on a Stick stand at the mall that have to wear those fucking ridiculous hats...you know the ones - the blue, yellow and red ones? Damn the man!
But still....Thank you Coffee Bean, thank you!
22.3.05
Things I believe:1. The recent media hoopla surrounding Terri Schiavo is ludicrious.
2. Nina Simone could be the best singer ever.
3. Biking down Sunset during rush hour is a death wish.
4. Riding a motorcycle in L.A. is a death wish.
5. Guns don't kill people.
6. Bullets do.
7. But the gun helps.
8. Nothing good is ever on cable and I'm glad I don't own a television.
9. My new cd is going to kick some serious ass.
10. I'd be a better person if I didn't eat meat.
11. The L.A. Underground is not a place, it is a state of mind.
12. Anchorman could be the funniest movie since Ace Ventura.
13. Those Canadian seals had it coming to them.
14. Hootie and the Blowfish are not the greatest band ever.
15. My life is unaffected by Barry Bonds injury.
16. Ghengis Khan could possibly be the greatest man ever to have lived.
18.3.05
Things I can't stand:1. The songs "Taking care of Business" and that song that goes "I don't
wanna work, I just wanna bang on my drums all day"
Who wrote these songs, and why? And why did the National Hockey League
use the latter tune as a replacement for "Hockey Night in Toronto" (or
Canada?) for a season in 2001? Who was behind this decision? Inquiring
minds want to know.
2. Lists.
Things I love (this week):
1. Wolfie's Live From San Francisco @ The Independent CD (he does this
gnarly thing with "I left my heart in San Francisco that I'm especially
pleased with. Ask him for a copy or email him at djwolfie@djwolfie.com
2. The fact that I'm playing with Jason Bentley and Donald Glaude on
April 12. Details coming soon.
3. Chris Goblet in Santa Fe, New Mexico for my 23 brand-spankin' albums.
Actually, I love all the Santa Fe kids every week, not just this one.
And you can find them at the upcoming Dark Skies event happening in
May. Details coming soon.
4. The 24 Season 3 DVD that I've been locked away watching with Audra
over a bin of Red Vines.
Earlier Rumors
